Monday, March 7, 2011


I chat online and on the phone w/ my twin a lot.

Today I asked her if she was excited about leaving to El Salvador (w/ her church to build a well in a town that needs clean water) this weekend.

She said she was but hated leaving her husband Lalo. Lalo,however, told her that although he was a bit jealous, he knew that a part of him was going. And my response to that was, "It's true Ari! A part of him is going!"

In my wedding vows, I told Gerson that my dreams were only getting bigger because his dreams were also becoming my dreams. I was excited and ready to share my life with his. I was ready to become as the Bible put it, ONE.

Fifteen days later, after our amazing honeymoon, I discovered that I had married a guy with probably $10,000 worth of credit card debt.

I couldn't understand how could someone with a decent salary owe so much money. WHY was the question I asked him over and over. WHY did he get into so much debt? WHY did he never tell me about it? WHY would he charge such things? WHY? WHY? WHY?

After literally crying and dwelling on it for some days, I decided to get over it! I realized that I was now a part of him, and not only would his amazing dreams become my dreams but his horrible debt would be mine as well.

Maybe what he needed was a woman like me to help him get rid of it, but I don't want to give myself too much credit. ;)

The point is that in a marriage you ARE as many like to call it, the other half. It's not only the good part that you should take from your spouse, but the bad too. Many times we have the habit of only taking the good because we refuse to accept our spouses' mistakes. I could have most definitely had the attitude of It's YOUR debt, so YOU pay it! But when I accepted that the debt was also mine, although I hadn't used any credit cards, I got my butt to work to help him pay them off.

I see Gerson & I as one. Is it easy? Of course not. But this is why I am here, to be his ideal help.

I believe in a marriage, we're going to screw up many times, but when we understand that it's not just me living my life, but together living this life, we're going to prosper much more.


Bianca said...

OMG Adri!!, me dejaste con la boca abierta, es tremenda la madurez con la que te expresas del matrimonio y de tu compromiso hacia Gerson, "en las buenas y en las malas". Me identifique contigo porque a mi me paso lo mismo, la diferencia es que mi esposo debe el doble de dinero y en Mexico!!! Yo si sabia de la deuda antes de casarnos y aunque me case con mi esposo a sabiendas, honestamente mi actitud hacia lo que debe siempre ha sido, ES TU DEUDA Y TU LA PAGAS en aras de lo que yo llamo lo que es justo, pero ahora que lei tu blog me pregunto, estare realmente bien? Debo ayudar a mi esposo al pago de la deuda ademas de todo lo que debemos pagar? Creo que son cosas que debo contestarme a la luz de la palabra de Dios y en breve. Gracias por tu blog, it's an eyeopener! Love u

Adri said...

Gracias Bianca! Para nada es facil asi que te entiendo... Lo que tambien pienso es que Gerson dentro de los aƱos que hemos estado casados me a demostrado que el haria cualquier cosa por mi. Fuera ayudarme con algo, rescatarme, pagar una deuda grande, etc etc yo se que el lo haria por mi. Por que me ama y quiere lo mejor para mi. Entonces yo me pregunto, si el lo haria por mi, porque yo no por el? ... Love you too! Oye y pon mas fotos de tu precioso nene! O mandame fotos x email que lo quiero ver. :)