Following Gerson.

2012 On a plane heading to Shanghai

I cannot believe my time in Anchorage, Alaska has come to an end... At least for now.

I survived two months in this beautiful freezing state. My husband daily worked from 14 to 16 hour shifts. I didn't have a car. I couldn't go out for strolls with the baby due to snow that would break my stroller. And as much as I would have loved to go and ski or visit other places, it's kind of difficult with a baby, a busy husband, and no transportation.


As I packed and got things ready, I received a notification that the airline I'm traveling with upgraded my seat. I knew I could upgrade but decided not to because my husband for some reason isn't a member of their frequent flyer. We had selected our seats in the very last row to sit together.

I called the airline asking them if they could either put me back to my original seat or upgrade my husband. The customer service rep looks at my husband's account and says Sorry, it looks like he's just a regular guy. Obviously this guy lacks phone etiquette or simply professionalism. What he meant to say is your husband is not a star member or has a regular account. I kind of wanted to joke along and say "My husband's everything but regular! He's the most amazing, intelligent, handsome person you could ever meet in your life!" But I held my tongue. After a couple of minutes, he asks me Ok ma'am, are you sure you want to sit at the very back versus the front? 

You see, this guy doesn't know that it's in my nature to follow my husband. I do it willingly. I do it because I absolutely love him! I don't care if the other side is luxurious. I don't care if following my husband means going to the freezing cold state of Alaska or the hot desert in Arizona miles away from my family I love and miss daily. He's my home now. He's the person I've chosen to do life with. And I have no regrets.

And so many times it's hard for me to leave who or what I love just to follow him. So I wrote this blog to always remember that yes, I will sit all the way to the back of the plane just to sit next to him. It's who I am.

Change is good.

10 years ago

Change has been on my mind lately. In my heart as well. Hence, the previous blog post.

Relationships go through change. It's part of life.

When I think about Gerson and I 10 years ago, I don't think I would recognize us. We were so different. As a couple we were two corny and cheesy romantics that couldn't get enough of each other. The things we would say to each other we probably wouldn't say anymore.

I've learned to embrace where my relationship is in the present. Right now. Yes, we're still romantic. We still have very special moments and  love each other more than we did when we first met, but I don't wish to go back. I don't see this change as a bad thing. I love where Gerson and I are right now. We've learned to accept and simply be ourselves. When we started dating, we might have been two people oblivious about everything (and everyone) but each other, however, I wasn't as confident. I didn't know if we were going to last forever. I didn't know if we would build a life together. I just knew that I had a hot boyfriend who was crazy about me... and hoped it would last.

Ask me now if I think my marriage will last. Without a doubt I will answer YES. We've invested years of trust, loyalty, love, growth, and maturity.

I was only 20 years old when Gerson and I began to date. We dated 3 years. And celebrating 7 years of marriage in November. I hope I've grown in these 10 years! No one wants to stay the same for that long. As an individual we desire to grow, excel, achieve, and improve.

Well, as a couple you should as well. Remembering how lovely it felt when he first kissed you. Or the first date. All the firsts are special and should remain in our hearts forever. But don't look at those special times wanting to go back. Move forward in your relationship. Build other memories and most importantly always love each other. Just because it's been 10 years, doesn't mean your relationship has to be dull and boring. Yes, we get comfortable with each other but always while your relationship changes and grows, continue to know how to love your partner.

Indulge him/her. Love him/her. And change will feel good.

Make Your Grass Greener

Have you ever seen a couple and thought, I wish my husband was as romantic as her husband or I wish my wife wore dresses like his wife.

Or you see a couple and think if only we were as rich as them or as good looking as them. I'm sure it's happened. I'm in the happiest relationship and sure we've occasionally had an envious thought. But what I've concluded is that there's no reason to desire such things. If you don't like where your relationship is going then do something about it. You have the power to change things!

If you don't like the way you look, do something about it. If you don't like that although you have two incomes yet you're always broke, don't wish for more money, get some financial counseling to learn how to manage your finances.

Stop wishing that your marriage or relationship could be better if only... It will not. So many people think the grass is greener on the other side but it really isn't. You can make your grass greener. If someone has a greener grass, it's probably because they've invested in it. They fertilize and water it. They take care of it.

Talk and listen to each other. If you think your sex life sucks, read on the subject. Talk to your spouse about it. If your relationship is going downhill SEEK HELP. Everybody can use marriage counseling. So many spouses want to save their marriage or improve but they do nothing about it. I know several friends who had the strongest desire to save their marriage but the husbands did not want to change things. They didn't want to seek help. They didn't care about the other person. They only cared about themselves. That's not how a relationship works. You can not be in a healthy, happy relationship only thinking of yourself. You want change, make it happen.

 Communicate with your partner about the changes in the most postive way. I believe in change. In the 6 years I've been married, I appreciate when we sit and talk about our failures or downhills. We don't judge or criticize. The times we've attacked each other, in never ends well. So we instead listen and see how we can be of help to improve and change such areas. Sometimes it's changing as an individual and other as a couple. But it's so important to communicate and encourage one another.

My last tip is learn from healthy marriages. I don't wish to be like my parents, but they have a beautiful marriage that inspires me to learn from them. Meet with older and wiser couples and learn from them.

It's Monday... The perfect day to start becoming a better WE. ;)

My Birth Story

This week I have decided to write about my little love... Gael.  I'll start with my birth story although it's 8 months later.

As many of you know, I worked for 2 years in San Antonio with an organization that allowed me to work closely with pregnant teens and women. That also gave me awesome connections in having the opportunity to not only inform myself but meet doulas and midwives. That being said, I knew that I wanted to try and go natural when having my first baby.

That's right. No meds. No induction. All natural. Thankfully, I also had a really great pregnancy. The first 12 weeks I had some nausea. And chicken would make me sick. But overall, I felt great. On my 37th week appointment I mentioned to one of the midwives that I had been itching. They had to run blood work, and because the results would take some days to arrive, I had to go in daily to have the baby's heart rate monitored. It was horrible cause I would spend most of my time at the hospital. The results finally came in on my 39th week. And my bio acids showed to be a bit high so the midwife said they were going to have to induce me. I was devastated. I called Gerson (he was in Arizona) crying telling him that this was not going as planned. However, this did mean Gerson would make it to the delivery since I was being induced.

Well, it was 2pm and the midwife asked me to arrive at the hospital at 6pm. I called my mom asked her to pack my bag and meet me at the hospital at 6. I drove myself to Houston's Galleria and walked like never before. I was sweating so much! I was going up and down the stairs. I had accepted the fact that I would be induced but still wanted to try and go natural.

When I got to the hospital my mom was there. We spoke with the midwife and she explained that she would give me an ambien so I could have a good rest. And cervidel to soften my cervix. I quickly googled cervidel cause I had never heard of it! I asked my midwife if this would help prevent induction in the morning. I so badly didn't want petocin. I didn't care so much about the epidural but I knew petocin would get to the baby and that's exactly what I didn't want. Well she said sadly it wouldn't. That I would need to be induced and they would start the petocin at 9am. Gerson arrived that night around 10pm. And my mom decided to head home and rest for the big due day.

Around 5:30 that morning, I started feeling cramps. By 6am I mentioned to the nurse that I believed I was getting contractions cause they were stronger than cramps. Around 6:30am  I had dialated up to 4 cm. I started to feel the contractions getting worst. So I asked Gerson to read me a Psalm. He had the audacity to ask which one. In my head I thought "I don't care! One that applies!"  But I calmly said "It doesn't matter" So he began to read one in Spanish. I read my Bible in English, so my Spanish comprehension in such state literally went out the window. I asked him to stop.

By 7am I was at 7cm. I remember Gerson smiling! He thought I was progressing so well and was happy that I was indeed in active labor and didn't have to be induced. My midwife was also smiling. I was the only one not smiling. I didn't care if it was 7cm, I was in so much pain!

That whole hour I was in transitional labor which is the worst. All I knew was that contractions were back to back and I couldn't catch a break. I asked my midwife for the epidural and her exact words were "You don't want it, your pain wants it. " I remember asking for music and that didn't work. I would just focus during contractions on this red little cross on the bed remote. I honestly didn't care about natural birth anymore. I wanted the meds! So they suggested I go to the jacuzzi/bath tub. That helped so much! I can't imagine going through those last contractions on the bed. I lasted about 30 minutes in the tub. But then I got too hot and asked to get out. As I got out of the tub, I felt like I needed to use the restroom. My doula said that I didn't need to use the restroom, those were signs that I was probably ready to push.

When she checked me she excitingly said "You're done! This baby is ready to come out!" Now this is when we all smiled! I was so ready for this push. I had read and heard so many stories of how pushing could take hours and all I thought was "I refuse!" I truly feel like I got this supernatural strength. I was determined! But what sucks is that you have to push while getting contractions which is horrible pain. So for the first seconds I hesitated and that's when I finally felt like crying. Through out my labor I never screamed or cried. I remained so calm that all the nurses and midwife kept telling me I had such great composure. You know, when you're feeling so much pain, you don't care about any compliments. You could  have told me I won a million dollars and I wouldn't have cared. I felt like I was going to die!

So when they asked me to push I cried "I can't! I can't!" And the nurse looked at me and said "Yes you can! Now listen, inhale, and push!" And I really did listen to her. I asked her to show me one more time and probably pushed a couple of times and my little Gael was out!  I was so happy! So so happy... that the labor was over!

I truly feel like God knew and blessed me with the desires of my heart. The nurses calculated my labor was approx. 3 hours long. It was such a fast labor. And I'm grateful that I experienced it the way I had desired, natural.

Gael Adrian Pineda was born a day after his daddy's birthday, July, 10, 2012 at 8:07am. He weighed 7lb 4oz. He truly has become the light of our home. We love how he's changed our lives!

Feelings

Gerson and I had a long distance relationship for the most part when we were dating.

The year we were engaged we were living only 4 hours away from each other. One afternoon I received a usual text saying " I miss you. " and then he added " I feel like having a drink with you. "

That evening as I got off from work, I'm walking to my car and there he was waiting for me. He had driven 4 hours to have a drink with me. I now realize that this man loves to surprise me.

We went to have dinner and he drove back to Dallas. I always cried when he left. We both had this desire to just be together. Married. No more distance cause distance sucks!

If you've been married for several years, do you remember that feeling? Not wanting to go home. Just wanting to be with that person all day and night. Driving miles just to see that person you love even if it was for a couple of hours. Cause to you it was worth it.

Those are the first stages of a relationship and it's beautiful. I like to remember those feelings with Gerson. Relationships change and grow. We now have the privilege of going home and waking up next to each other.

Don't ever take that for granted. There's nothing wrong with remembering even if your relationship is in a different stage. Personally, it's a reminder for me of how blessed we are to have found each other .

My 20's

Chicago 2009

So this week I turn the big 3-0.

I feel young and great but I do realize I'm entering that next level. It's exciting. I also remembered just yesterday that at 20 years old was when Gerson and I became friends. I spent all of my 20's enjoying birthdays with my love.  Therefore,  I've decided this week to share some of my "love story" memories with you.

One of my favorite anniversaries was when Gerson surprised me with a trip to Chicago. It was the night before, I was heading to bed and he said "I wanted to tell you at midnight but since you're going to bed I want to tell you that tomorrow at 6am we are going to Chicago as an anniversary trip!" I couldn't believe it! I thought well I have to call my boss and he had already done that for me. I stayed up til 4am packing. It was so exciting! All week he had told me he had made dinner plans for that weekend but I didn't know they would be in another city. It was so fun and special!

Actually, something I learned from this trip was that it's almost vital to take a weekend getaway with your loved one at least once a year if possible. Not a full vacation where you sight see and stuff. Just a mini getaway where you can go talk, reminisce, eat good food, and make love. No distractions, no worries, just feeling the love you have for one another. The place doesn't even matter. It's sort of like a little honey-moon. And I'm sure you're thinking I can talk, eat food, and make love in my own house, which you can, but there's something about just getting away. Even if it's 30 miles from where you live. It becomes about just the two of you. I recommend it!

Well, that's one of my favorites memories especially since I love surprises!

HAPPY MONDAY

Hershey's Kisses & Reminiscing

  

How was your Valentine's Day?

We had a great one. Very low key. Stayed home. Gerson was thoughtful and sweet as always. And as always Gerson included with all the little gifts Hershey's Kisses.

There are certain things that Gerson has done from the beginning of our love story. Ever since we were dating, on a special occasion, he would show up to my apartment and then eventually to our bedroom with breakfast and goodies from La Madeline. There's no La Madeline where we're living now, so he may have to change it. But another thing he does on Valentine's day is provide Hershey's kisses with my gifts.


Which always takes us back to when Gerson was pursuing me. We were just friends and ended up going to the same party. I had no idea he was going to be there. But he loved the way I looked and even remembers a necklace I wore that night. Well, my sweet and corny husband interrupted a conversation I was having with a friend, who was a guy, and bluntly asked "Can I give you kiss?" My friend obviously felt awkward. So I just gave him a "you're so lame" look and extended my hand towards him. I knew Gerson was always full of corny jokes and pick-up lines. He then handed me a Hershey's kiss.

Oh what a bliss to reminisce. :)


HAPPY FRIDAY EVERYONE!